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Wednesday, February 19, 2014

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"So, have you been making any impulsive decisions lately?" my shrink asks, pointedly staring at my faded pink hair. "Not th...
Sunday, January 26, 2014

Sometimes The Kid surprises me

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Sometimes it's even in a good way. Last night we're watching some sitcom and one of the characters mentions something about the ...
Monday, November 04, 2013

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him: We have to leave in a minute, are you going to get dressed? me (looking down at my sweats and baggy t-shirt): It's 7AM and I...
Wednesday, October 30, 2013

Dear Young Guy Who Works at the Walgreen's Pharmacy,

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Every single time I go to pick up my meds, you're working and that's great because you're much nicer and more competent than the...
Tuesday, October 29, 2013

at the risk of sounding like a swooning schoolgirl...

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THE KANYE WEST CONCERT WAS THE MOST AMAZING THING EVER. IT WAS HUGE AND OVER-THE-TOP, WITH PYROTECHNICS, FACELESS DANCERS, A MOUNTAIN ON STA...
Thursday, October 24, 2013

You might be depressed if...

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Upon completion of your shower, you realize that you've forgotten to bring a clean towel into the bathroom and you spend a good five min...
Monday, October 21, 2013

THIS POST DESERVES ALL CAPS!!!!

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ONE WEEK FROM TODAY, I'M GOING TO SEE KANYE WEST IN CONCERT AND I AM UNREASONABLY EXCITED ABOUT IT!!!!!! ONE WEEK AFTER THAT, I'M...
Sunday, October 13, 2013

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The Kid (playing a violent video game) : I just got offered a mission to kill four people for $7000. Would you kill four people for $7000?...
Wednesday, September 04, 2013

Even laziness needs checks and balances

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After spending a week in a state full of insanely healthy people, I decided to get a little ambitious, dust the cobwebs off of my bike, pump...
Friday, August 30, 2013

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me (asleep): ... him (off work today for the long weekend, loudly "creeping" into the bedroom and clearing his throat): ... m...