Monday, June 06, 2005

Who buys cutesy bumper stickers anymore?

I know that the "Imagine Whirled Peas" seemed cute the first time you saw it... back in 1994 - but is it really a statement you want attached to you for the rest of the time you own your vehicle?

And threatening to "flick a booger" on my windshield wasn't even funny the first time.

And, yippee that your kid is "an honor student at random public school", but he's five, how hard is that, really?

And, no, I don't want to ask you about your grandchildren, schnauzer or business selling Mary Kay Cosmetics - because I really don't care - and seriously, what would you do if someone actually stopped and asked you?

And no one believes that your other car is a Ferrari

And no one cares that you're "49% angel, 51% devil" or that you go from "Zero to Bitch in 6 seconds"

And you don't need that handicapped license plate, we could tell from your George W bumper sticker

In closing, you may have thought that the bumper sticker was cute, amusing, inspirational, or motivational, but it's not... and you wasted $1.99 on it