Wednesday, May 18, 2005

Still haven't found what you're looking for?

I'm ecstatic to report that the number one phrase people have used to find me on Google in the last week is "Play with my boobs"*

Also popular are:

"Dog the bounty hunter hearing aids"**

"Best Boobs in Hollywood"***

"goat milk cures excema" ****

"poonani pictures" *****

and my personal favorite

"Hasselhoff Lemonade" ******




*go ahead and google that - not at work - and you'll get this game wherein there's a chick with big boobs and with your mouse you operate a pair of black rubber gloves and you can squeeze her boobs... and, FYI, in case you're wondering, it's not half as much fun as it sounds, seriously, it loses it's appeal after about 45 minutes or so... okay, maybe an hour or two... whatever

** Chicago/boob story for the day - we were in this cool punk bar and I'm drunk so I'm talking to this construction worker guy and, staring at my chest, he says "you've got a great rack, can I see them?" "Has that line ever worked for you?" I ask. "No." "We'll keep that streak going. And, really, they're not that great, it's the bra" - Yeah, even totally drunk I can't take a "compliment"

*** I don't think it's a hearing aid, I think it's some kind of microphone device thing

**** perhaps, but then you smell like a petting zoo so it doesn't matter if your skin is red and scaly because no one wants to come near your livestock-y ass anyway

***** GOSH - what kind of blog do you think this is?

****** Mmmmm, Hasselhoff Lemonade - now with 25% of your recommended daily allowance of chest hair and speedo

Labels: boobs