Wednesday, January 04, 2006

It's entirely possible that I could qualify for handicapped parking now...

I was going to do an audio post, but it's kind of hard to talk with my foot in my mouth...

So... you may or may not remember, but some time ago I posted about how I was sure that someone had stolen gas out of my gas tank. I was pretty upset.

Then, I happened to be driving somewhere that same day and I looked down at my gas gauge and saw the needle leaning towards the right... towards the right? How could that be? My gas was pilfered, wasn't it?

Nope, apparently it wasn't.

Apparently, I'm dyslexic.

or I think I'm turning Japanese (I think I'm turning Japanese, I think I'm turning Japanese, I really think so*)

or I'm just a complete dumbass.

But when I thought the gas was gone, I had been reading from right to left (not left to right, like a normal person).

In my defense - it's an older Mercedes, so the gas gauge doesn't read "E" for empty or "F" for full - it says "R" for empty and has an icon of a gas pump for full... I think perhaps, I was seeing the needle leaning towards the gas pump and thinking that it was telling me I needed to get gas...?

Not in my defense - I've had the car for a freaking year

In my defense - I've never read it like that before

Not in my defense - I'm still a dumbass for reading it like that, then writing about it, and then writing about it again... Man, I hope no one's reading today (and if they are, I hope they find it half as funny as Andi and I did... although I think she was laughing at me, instead of with me... which is actually okay, since I was laughing at me, roo)

So, if any Savannaha criminals happen to read this, sorry, my bad (I hate that phrase).

* Does anyone remember that song?**

** Did you know that song is about masturbation?***

*** I'm totally trying to divert your attention from the fact that I'm a complete and total eeeee-diot.