Saturday, October 31, 2009

Notes from Trick or Treating

Dear Teenage Boy Wearing a Banana Costume -

First of all, the correct response to my query of "is it peanut butter jelly time?" was not rolling your eyes and sneering "yeah". You're the one dressed like a 2-year-old internet meme, don't get snotty with me about that.

Second, you're about 5 years too old to be out begging for candy. Go read a book or something.


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My kid cracks me up - he went up to a house (a house with fall decorations AND porch lights on) and knocked politely. Five seconds later, the next door neighbor walks out of HIS house and yells (in a kind of rude manner) "NOBODY'S HOME RIGHT NOW!!!!" (exclamation points and all)

My kid trudges down the front steps and falls into step with me as he says "Then they shouldn't have their _______ porch lights on!"

I stopped in the middle of the street. "What did you say?"

"I said they shouldn't have their _______ porch lights on!"

And, yes, he left the little bleeped out spot in his sentences.


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In the begging for candy, my kid dragged home about 700 pounds of candy. Add to that the 400 pounds I bought to give out (of which we passed out about 5 pieces) and we've got enough candy for the next three Halloweens.

Labels: adventures in shitty parenting