Sunday, December 07, 2008

Dear Burger King,

The following conversation will NEVER take place:

Person #1: "Do you want Burger King or McDonalds for lunch?"

Person #2: "I can't decide, which one did those Transylvanian farmers choose?"

Person #1: "They picked Burger King"

Person #2: "And they've never had burgers before? I'm sold! Burger King it is!"

Lamest.
Ad Campaign.
Ever.

Seriously, why would I care which brand of artery clogging Mongolian yak farmers chose? These are guys who probably eat fermented carrot and sheep's bladder soup. They've never had a burger before, how on earth are they qualified to tell me which one tastes best? That's like asking Mormons which light beer tastes best. Or asking the Amish which luxury sedan is the best designed. Or asking Mennonites whether the iPhone or the Blackberry is cooler. Or asking inner-city hooligans the best method for churning butter.

You're paying people to come up with this stuff? Can I have a job? I guarantee I could come up with something that involves neither remote villagers nor that creepy King mask.

Let me know where to forward my resume.

Thanks,

me

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