Wednesday, September 14, 2005

Whether or not you are aware, Julie and I have two brothers, one of whom is getting married next month (the other one is technically only a half-brother, he was the product of a drunken one night stand between our mom and her then-husband's friend, he was given up for adoption at birth [lucky, bastard] and now lives in New Zealand - very nice guy, actually)

The brother who is getting married is a tall, red-headed, hockey playing, computer geek (not that there's anything wrong with any of that) who lives in Atlanta with his fiance, a darling little elf of a girl originally from New York.

Let me say right now that I don't especially like weddings* - I know, because I'm a girl, I'm supposed to revel in them, but they're just so fussy and expensive, you know? It's like prom for one girl. I probably wouldn't be going if it weren't family (not to give you the impression that we're one of those "close families"), but it is family, so I am (oh, and my kid is the ring-bearer, so I'm dying to see him dressed up like a pint sized James Bond) and it's in Georgia (so we don't have to fly) and part of the wedding package is family accommodations at a big guest house (so we don't have to get a hotel room) but then there's the subject of a present. Williams-Sonoma is the only place I know them to be registered (I know her family has cash, but you'd think they could at least register at Target for those of us who don't) and yesterday I pulled up the registry and - Oh. My. Lord. - who really needs a $30 asparagus steamer or a $20 flavor injector? I know, I know, registries are wish lists, but... Come on, a batter dispenser? Unless you're opening an IHOP franchise, you're not making THAT many pancakes... but I'll play along because it's kitchen stuff and I'll do anything to encourage people to cook - my quandary, however, is whether to get them something that they'll use a lot (like the 10 piece glass bowl set, or the cast iron skillet, or the butter dish) or something completely useless that they'll use once and give away the next time that they move (like the sandcastle-shaped bundt pan, the hard-boiled egg slicer, or the whisk with a thermometer)


*the only other wedding I want to go to for a long time is my sister's... oh, and my second one when John Mayer finally wises up and proposes to me... Oh, and any wedding over which I officiate (don't laugh, I've been asked by 2 different couples to preside over their Vegas ceremonies)