Thursday, May 18, 2006

Instant Karma*

*Don't read this if you're squeamish over bodily functions or you're under the impression that I'm a girly girl and you'd like to hold onto that.

Backstory: I've been a little sick lately, and I'm mostly better, but I've still got some crap in my chest.

Last night, after a particularly harsh derby practice, I was stopped at a light on my way home when my lungs revolted and I coughed up a big pat of lung butter.

I made the decision to be completely gross, crack open my door, lean over and deposit it onto the street.

After this was done and I was completely icked out by myself, I noticed that my light was green so I slammed the door shut and put my foot on the gas pedal.

I wasn't even onto the on ramp when I realized that a giant handful of my gross sweaty hair was stuck in the door. And then I almost ran myself off the road trying to free myself.

I really have no business being allowed in public by myself.