Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Pet peeves of the day

1) Girls who like looking at their faces too much - you know these girls, the girls who own seventy-five framed pictures of themselves. The ones who are always performing and insist that you watch their every freaking move. What looks like hubris is actually naked insecurity (and, on many ocassions, naked boobs).

2) Passive aggressive women who refuse to be candid - example - I'm the peon and I make the coffee every day - however, I'm a coffee snob, and I won't sink down to the level of Folgers (EVER), so I don't so much care about the coffee and this crazy woman at work will pour herself a mug, take a sip and say, loud enough for everyone to hear, "Wow, [other woman in the office] must have made this, I know she likes it strong..." and then when no one responds (she talks a lot, so she doesn't usually get a response). "Wow, this sure is strong, I'm gonna be bouncin' off the walls all day long!" - If she didn't insist on being a passive aggressive asshole, she could choose from one of two options:

• suck it the hell up, add more creamer and move the hell on with her life
• kindly say "I know you don't drink the coffee here, but I would appreciate it if you didn't make it so strong that it gives me day-long diarreah."

(Ladies of the world, stop with the passive-agressive and resign yourself to one or the other - either be passive and accept your panties being in a constant state of wadded-ness, or be aggressive and get something done once in a while)

3) The fact that I, for some unknown reason, can't seem to force myself to make contact with anyone whom I don't see every day at work or skate with three times a week - I swear, what's wrong with me?

Labels: boobs