Monday, June 23, 2008

The thing about parenting...

One of those parenting things that no one tells you is that there's more to being a "good mom" than just serving balanced meals and making sure your kid has an ample supply of clean underwear.

You've also got to give them every shot you can at fitting in - stuff like making sure their shoes fit right, that their haircut doesn't accidentally grow into a mullet and that they have some semblence of social skills (basic stuff like using silverware and not pooping in the middle of class). You don't want your kid to be that kid in class who smells like pee or eats paste in fifth grade. Childhood is hard enough without having a neon "give me a wedgie" sign hanging over his head.

You've also got the responsibility to be a halfway cool parent, at least in public - stuff like not wearing a tube top to a parent-teacher , not forgetting him overnight at a birthday party and not calling him "my fluffy little monkey butt" around his friends.

But there are also those times when you have to put on your big girl panties and throw "cool" to the wind - like this evening when some skankbag's bastard child elbowed my precious kid IN THE FACE during a game. I pointed out, perhaps a bit loudly, that moves like that weren't kosher. The skankbag, in her infinite wisdom, screamed that it was "part of the game". I inquired as to which game she was referring, since... basketball does not traditionally go by the same rule set as Ultimate Fighting. She volunteered, in the most shrill, grating voice imaginable, that "[her] husband doesn't teach the kids to play dirty" (which was truly weird since 1. I hadn't mentioned anything about her husband and 2. he obviously does). I protested, suggesting that my child shouldn't have to risk his dental health merely to make a lay-up. To which the skankbag responded by... telling my husband to tell me to "shut up". I'm guessing, when that's her only comeback, that I've won. Which lands me on the right side of cool. This time, anyway.

Labels: adventures in shitty parenting