Friday, January 07, 2011

Letters

Dear Mom of Some Kid on The Kid's Basketball Team,

I don't understand how you had time to pick out earrings for your outfit for the game, but didn't have time to CHANGE OUT OF YOUR PAJAMA BOTTOMS. I'm judging you for that.

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Dear American Movie-Going Public,

I'm totally judging you for making that effing Fockers movie number one at the box office. I mean, really, how starved for entertainment are you?


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Dear "Celebrity"/"Star"-type Reality Show Producers,

Would it be possible to raise the bar on who we're considering "stars" or "celebrities" now? Like, if someone is only known for being on another reality show, can we not consider them famous until they've contributed at least the tiniest bit towards society?

~~~~~~~~~

Dear Whomever Decided To Publish A Book By Snooki,

Really? I mean REALLY?

First of all - is the publishing world this desperate for material? How would you not resort to going door to door looking for writers?

Second, and, I feel, most important - are fans of Snooki's the type of people you'd expect to find in book stores?

xxoo,

the bitter, unpublished writer

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