Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Things About Which I Am Currently Freaking The Fuck Out

• My freaking surgery is Thursday at 7:30AM
• I have to get to the hospital 2 hours ahead of time*
• The night before and the morning of the surgery, I'm only allowed to use some specific hospital-provided bodywash and NO lotion or deodorant**
• The operation is on my lower back which means I'm going to be ass-up on the operating table
• What are they going to do with my arms during the surgery?
• I don't think the hospital has wifi
• I hope they don't make me spend the night, I'd rather just grab a couple of handfuls of meds and go home
• Medical insurance confuses the fuck out of me 
• I just got a freelance writing job with one of MTV's websites and it pays money, real American money - how cool is that? I've even filled out tax forms and everything, so I'm a legit (freelance) employee
• I've gotten a teeny bit of movement back in my left foot

(I'm freaking the fuck out in a good way about the last couple)

*I don't understand - is there going to be a line? Do I have to go through the TSA? Is it a first-come-first-served situation? Will there be snacks? I already got my bloodwork and EKG done.

**I'm so worried about stinking and being leathery - I would say I hope that the operating room is cold so I don't sweat, but I don't want it so cold that the surgeon's hands get all crampy and numb, dude needs to be in prime condition for the tiny little surgery with that microscope and power tool since, if I'm not going to get a cool scar out of this***, it had better get me ambulatory and out of pain

*** it's microsurgery so the incision is going to be less than an inch

Labels: first world problems