Friday, December 23, 2005

In spite of the headline of this story on this page, the headline on cnn.com (yeah, I check the news every morning, so?) was "Police shooting ends standoff."

Shut up. Really?

What's the next completely fucking obvious headline?

"Fiery crash ends car chase"?

"Birth of a child brings an end to unplanned pregnancy"?

"Projectile vomiting ends drinking binge"?

"Loss of eye ends day of fun"?

"Courtney Love is a talentless, money-grubbing whore*"?

*Okay, that didn't really fit into the theme of the rest of them, but I just heard that she's selling the rights to the Nirvana catalog (which 1. she shouldn't have had in the first place. and 2. means that Nike could buy them and you could hear "Smells Like Teen Spirit" in a shoe commercial - and then the world will end) - I think she's had more than enough chances to be a human being and can't seem to make it, so humanely euthanizing her would be the best thing to do at this point before she ends up on "The Surreal Life" or an episode of "Desperate Housewives"