Tuesday, February 26, 2013

House hunting in Southern California is ridiculous.

You start out by looking at the chunk of change that you've been approved to spend and you think "that's a pretty significant chunk of change, I bet we can get an awesome place!" So you come up with a completely unreasonable wish list, stuff like:

  • Something mid-century modern, clean lines, open feeling, interesting architectural details
  • Original wood floors
  • At least 2000 square feet (but not too much more because that would be greedy)
  • Maybe 3 bathrooms (but definitely not more, that's too much cleaning)
  • A HUGE bathtub in one of the bathrooms, somewhere I could at least stretch out my legs
  • A nice backyard for the dogs
  • Maybe a pool?
  • Maybe a koi pond
  • A vegetable garden (or at least a big place for one)
  • Maybe a couple of fruit trees
  • A 6-burner gas stove
  • Stainless steel appliances
  • A GINORMOUS walk-in closet
  • A room hidden behind a sliding bookcase
  • A moat (with or without a dragon)
  • A curved driveway
  • 3 car garage
  • Quiet, safe neighborhood

you know you won't get everything on the list, but you figure you should probably be able to get more than half because that's not unreasonable, right?

A month into house-hunting, you think there are some things on the list that you could probably live without. I mean, a pool is a lot of work. And a moat probably requires some kind of special insurance. And trying to keep the dogs out of a koi pond would probably be a hassle. And no one really needs a 6-burner stove, 4 is always sufficient. And you'd probably show off the hidden room so much that it would completely negate the secrecy of it. And 1500 square feet would really be more than enough as long as it's laid out well.

Three months into house-hunting, you pretty much just cross your fingers when you're on the way to a viewing that the house isn't an active crime scene. Anything else will be fine and you should probably just put in an offer if you ever want to buy anything.


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