Sunday, July 18, 2010

Dear me,

You are generally acknowledged as one of the clumsiest persons on the planet.

It's not really your fault, you were born with a grace-deficiency, it happens.

You may want to keep this in mind, though, if you get it into your head that it's a good idea to take your dog and your camera out for a hike on a lovely Sunday Morning.

If you do decide to do this, please stop trying to walk and take pictures at the same time. That's when stuff like this happens:

(this is what it looked like right after it happened [hence, all the dirt and crap all over my leg] in the hours since that, my knee has swelled up to about twice its normal size and turned a lovely rainbow of colors)

If you know stuff like that is going to happen, you might want to start carrying a first aid kit, or at the very least, a couple bandages to soak up some of the blood.

Also, if the cute guy in the information center offers you a map of the trails, take it. That way, when you're several miles from the information center and you stumble and twist the crap out of your ankle and bloody up your knee, you can find a shorter route back instead of taking your own as-the-crow-flies shortcuts where you'll probably trip over a ground squirrel burrow and twist your other ankle. Genius.

One last thing? You're white - pasty white - stop forgetting your effing sunblock!




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