Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Today, I had to go to Walmart to buy some stuff and, as usual, the people of Walmart (especially the moronic fuckfaces in the parking lot none of whom know how to drive, park or even fucking WALK in the fucking* parking lot) made me feel nearly homicidal, so I decided to stop by the Petsmart in the same parking lot to see the rescue kittens they have there and pick up some crickets for the lizard.

As usual, a few minutes of playing with kitties put me in a much better mood, then as I was heading towards the registers, I passed a woman with a baby bloodhound in her cart - he had a tiny little pinhead and big giant velvet ears and enormous paws and she named him after the dog from "The Fox and the Hound". I was just about ready to steal him until she started talking about how gigantic his poops are.

"I have a Jack Russell," she said. "And he has such tiny ones, but his are big old human-sized poops!"

Before I bid her farewell, I reminded her that when he's full grown, he's going to have Brontosaurus-sized ones.

And because I was too busy squeeing over the puppy to take a picture of him, here is a picture of how my cat demonstrating the proper technique for relaxation: -

and, because I like to illustrate just how ridiculous my life is, here is a picture of what I bought at Petsmart today -

Yes, it's a "Can O' Crickets" - and can you see what it says on the side? "Natural juices locked in the can". You can't even imagine the smell.

*fun fact: I shout more expletives in a Walmart parking lot than anywhere else in the world - I even get creative, I muttered "you motherfucking goat humper" at some old man who trapped me in a parking space for five minutes while he maneuvered his giant SUV in and out of a spot that was way too small for it.


1 comment(s):

  • Ooh...and if I remember correctly, bearded dragons LOVE mealworms and other assorted disgusting smelling things. Awwww...

    By Blogger Jootastic, at 5:10 PM  

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